A Filipina journeys through 2 marriages, 3 books and a life lived fully

The author, wearing a 'gumamela' flower on her hair

The author, wearing a ‘gumamela’ flower on her hair

By Heidy Ramos

At the age of 16, I was a runaway, working in a tailor shop. At that time, I met my first husband Nick in Subic, Zambales, where he was stationed by the U.S. Navy.

After getting married, Nick and I were relocated to Vallejo, California. In a naval housing community, we raised our two beautiful children, Heidy Nicole and Joseph. Also in Vallejo, we met Brenda, the best friend who destroyed my marriage.

After my divorce, I met my second husband, Sean at a sports bar. I was standing in the back, laying low, until he came over and asked for a dance.

Sean was also a Navy sailor and was stationed in San Diego, where we married and had our two amazing children, Allison and Patrick. Sean also took on the role of father to my first two children. We lived in San Diego for seven years until we had to move to Syracuse, New York to care for his aging mother.

We moved to a little town named Bridgeport. We had difficulty finding a house that could accommodate a family of six. We were living with his mother in a small ranch house with one bathroom. Eventually, we found our home right around the corner.

I found a job as a nursing assistant and buried myself in work and understanding my new environment. I fell in love with Upstate New York’s abundant nature.

Though I loved the scenery of my new home state, my neighbors were not as welcoming. We quickly learned of the prejudice people in the community had. Being a family with two children who are part African-American and two part caucasian children, some of the neighbors would make terrible remarks about our multiracial family. This caused stress in our marriage.

One day I had an accident at work. I broke my back working as a nurse’s assistant. I was taken out of work for two years. I underwent extensive physical therapy. After my recovery, Sean and I welcomed another beautiful child into our family, Shannon. While this was occurring, my marriage was falling apart.

As, I got better we thought our marriage would get better too. Sadly, the pressure mounted since Sean started training to become a Sheriff’s Deputy.

I was diagnosed with Endocervical Adenocarcinoma, a form of cancer affecting the cervix. I was very sick most of the time during this period. My oldest daughter took the responsibility of being the mother. Sean and I divorced eventually.

After all my trials and tribulation, the Lord has stayed by my side. My son Joseph has finished his studies in computer programming. Heidy Nicole is now a nurse and studying for pre-med. Allison is taking up her master’s degree in education. Patrick is studying mechanical engineering. Shannon is a cheerleader.

Before I knew it, I have published three books: a collection of poetry “Secret Whispers,” my memoir “Island of Dreams: Memoirs of My Life,” and a children’s book “The Girl Who Wears Gumamela Flower.”

Heidy’s multiracial children Joseph, Heidy Nicole, Allison, Patrick and Shannon

Heidy’s multiracial children Joseph, Heidy Nicole, Allison, Patrick and Shannon

Author Heidy Ramos of Bridgeport, New York recently did a book signing at a Barnes and Noble store in Upstate N.Y. and the Bridgeport Public Library. She works as a medical assistant for an obstetrician/gynecologist.

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  1. Sonia wrote:

    Hi Heidy,

    You are a spectacular gal. Just be the way you are.


  2. Dear Heidy,

    What a great inspiration for everyone! Life has many ups and downs and many sacrifices and you have been through most of it but still you have the courage and wisdom to be a successful woman. You have a beautiful family and you are a wonderful mom!


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